what's your damage?

homemessagesubmitarchive

justalilblondemama:

Accidental personal injuries are absolutely the worst. “Oh, how did you do that?” “Well, frankly, I’m an idiot.”

dropdeadesu:

spotonmysoul:

#i don’t need to look where i’m shooting #caw caw motherfuckers

No, but can we talk about this. HE KNEW THIS MOTHERFUCKER WAS COMING. Either he’d sighted them before or (and this is my thinking, because HAWKEYE) he saw them coming in the windows of another building.

He makes split second calculations and looses an arrow WITHOUT LOOKING, and hits his target dead on.

This isn’t him showing off or anything. It’s tactical. It’s watching your own six while watching someone else’s.

This is years upon years of training, muscle memory, and straight up intelligence that puts most people to shame, all coming into play.

And let’s not forget, SHIELD’s physicists couldn’t figure out the tesseract opened from both sides. Yet Clint did.

When it comes down to it? This man is one of the biggest BAMFS in the Marvelverse, MCU or comics.

Clint’s human. He’s said it himself:

“You cowboy around with the Avengers some. Guys got, what, armor. Magic. Super-powers. Super-strength. Shrink-dust. Grow-rays. Magic. Healing factors. I’m an orphan raised by carnies fighting with a stick and a string from the Paleolithic era. So when I say this looks “bad”? I promise you it feels worse.”

HE.

IS.

HUMAN.

And he does all this. And keeps up with people with superpowers.

I present to you: One of the baddest of asses ever to walk the planet. Clint. Mother. Fucking. Barton.

Another thing I’m not sure if many people know, but Clint is generally either blind or (at least partially) deaf in many works.  

where did i think i could go ?

apolkadottedowl:

sasstrid-and-dorkcup:

madehimsaycomfychairs:

floacist:

iwishitwas1983:

I’m crying.

LMAOOOOOOOOO the screaming in the beginning

"mr. owl"
"oh jesus christ"
"please don’t give me that look"
"please don’t fly"

DYING omg

That owl is 30000000% done

every time this video graces me with its presence i feel obliged to reblog it

I would have loved to see his reaction if the owl had flown right back in the window.

anime-pussy:

materiajunkie:

"Curing AIDS? Shit, that’s like Cadillac making a car that lasts for 50 years. And you know they can do it, but they ain’t going to do nothing that fucking dumb. Shit, they got metal on the Space Shuttle that can go around the Moon and withstand  temperatures of up to 20,000 degrees, you mean to tell me you don’t think they can make an El Dorado with a fuckin’ bumper that don’t fall off?"

- Chris Rock (“Bigger and Blacker”, 1999)

I will forever love Chris Rock as a comedian because he always speaks the truth

jeong-jeong:

Sorry Ming Hua, imma let you finish, but Aang had the best water bended octopus tentacles of all time

Let this be a sign, Let this road be mine

offtide:

twitter sketches that got increasingly elaborate pt. 2

sarahseeandersen:

Some of my personal struggles with both loving and hating makeup at the same time.

sarahseeandersen:

Some of my personal struggles with both loving and hating makeup at the same time.